Catherine, Called Hammer

As Aaron Carter would say, here's a little bit of old school for ya.



Circa 1997, this was a revolutionary text for one young Mary Catherine. First of all, circa 1997 I was unaware anyone else spelled their name the same as me...yes, even in Ireland.

But most of all, I was really into historical fiction as a youth. That, and books about the Holocaust.

After reading this book I began incorporating 1290s slang into my journal. A typical entry might read something like this:

June 8, 1997

GOD'S TEETH!! Mother and Father hath questions about my diet of wheat and berries and vegetables! [It should be noted here that my parents had zero problem with my vegetarianism/obsession with "erasing the endangered species list."] Me lady in waiting (Nell) shall be my only confidante in this terrible matter.

It was the beginning of a long and beautiful tradition of pretentious journal entries.



I leave you with something that has been preoccupying my mind these past few days:

Me: Why are Robin Thicke videos so very, very bad?
Christian: Yeah, I know. They're horrible.
Me: Especially this one for "When I Get You Alone."
Christian: Oh wait -- you mean the greatest video of ALL TIME.